Adult for a Minute

I'm not sure what catalysts led to this self revelation, but I'm sure there were a great many things that had happened in the past few weeks, months, or years for such a thought to take place.

Perhaps it was the matching night stands we purchased and assembled for our bedroom after just shy of 5 years of marriage. Their predecessors were well on their way to retirement from the nightstand business. The first, was a four-drawer dresser inherited from Christy's great-grandmother. This, of course, was on Christy's side.  Not a bad piece of furniture at all. We just thought something matching would be better. The dresser, will remain with us and perhaps one day receive the title of "dresser". The second, was a wire framed microwave stand covered with a scrap piece of brown burlap cloth. This, of course, was on my side.  Although hideous, this piece of furniture was not all together bad.  I'll really miss my midnight hot-pocket with the added convenience of never having to have exposed my delicate little toes to the frigid night air.  90 second pepperoni pizza was just an arm's reach away.  The microwave stand will be leaving us.

Perhaps it was the commencement of this blog and more reading in general which has been a recent addition to my daily diet.  Two weeks ago, I finished Ayn Rand's Atlas  Shrugged. 1200 pages of deep philosophy, thinking and polotics. If you ask me if I think it's worth the read, I might raise my shoulders slightly and momentarily to express doubt, ignorance, or indifference. I'm also currently enjoying my first Dickens' novel Oliver Twist. I'm sure I was suppose to have already read Dickens elsewhere in life, but I'm not sure I would have appreciated his wit and poignancy until now.  I'm really enjoying chasing young Oliver around London. There are so many unexpected changes and/or surprises in the plot development. And then there's this blog which is the most extraordinary thing I've ever read.


Perhaps it was taking a stand against a bully for the first time in my life.  Christy had invited a friend over who is by no means a regular at our building.  Upon our guests arrival and hearing the access door open, Christy made a move to greet our guest at the door, but before Christy had the chance to turn the knob our neighbor across the hall houdinied into the foyer and accosted our guest. "From NOW on make SURE you don't park SO CLOSE to the mulberry tree." On my own way to the door I'm thinking "That really could not just have happened."  After our friend escaped the claws of death and made it safely into our unit, I could see the look of pure befuddlement on her face.  After confirming the offense I went door knockin.  This is what I told our welcoming neighbor. "PACHOW!" Sadly, it took 3 prior incidents for me to actually call her on something.

All this to say, as I entered in to Bucky's room last night as he was still falling asleep, he gave me the sweetest Bucky smile with the sweetest Bucky voice that said simply, "Hi Daddy."  This Man at Home can melt occasionally.  Although I wanted to cuddle I knew doing so would lead to another hour of awake time, and I also knew I had to stick to the task at hand. Diaper Duty. So with all the elements of the afore mentioned and the sweetness of this Bucky moment, as I carefully loaded my good night treasures into a grocery bag to be transported to a more permanent home, the thought, feeling, emotion and statement were all upon me for the first time in my life.  "I'm an adult."

For that brief moment, I could sense a vast array of new doors to be explored. Wisdom. Responsibility. Productive. Contributor to Society.  I'd always known about these doors and had been told stories about them and how they actually existed, but it wasn't until now that I got to see them face to face.  And what was more is that in my childhood I had been so afraid to enter these doors, but now that they were tangible the fear was gone and I was now able and confident to take on such pursuits!  And just as  Bucky's and Jack's contributions to the day disappeared into the garbage can, so too did my momentary peek at true adulthood.





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Stay-at-Home Dad, stay at home dad, SAHD